Probably horrible movie based on a video game/inspired by video game culture Review File #1: Gamer

 "Move aside The Running Man, there's a new game in town: it's called...uh, well it's called Gamer...and it's...uh...well, it's like all Running Man and shit...but it's...you know, like hardcore and extreme and current and stuff!!! Video Games are all big-time now, right?  I mean, that's what all the kids like these days. They still like violence and titties and swearing though, too, amirite?"
 

   When I first heard about Gamer (and throughout it's marketing campaign), that quote is essentially what I believed was most likely the pitch for this film. I assumed, like most other movies that have attempted to tackle that culture, Gamer would probably be some pandering, shoddy, quick cash-in like so many movies before it. Not only that, they were also simply ripping off The Running Man, to boot! Most films either adapted from video games, or based around the people who play them, are pretty goddamned shitty (and that's being somewhat charitable). So could this actually be the exception to the rule? The answer is, unsurprisingly, no...but, surprisingly, sprinkled with a fair amount of yes!

Dude, I will cut your fucking throat if you're just blowin' smoke up my ass.

     I will begin by saying that, yes, Gamer is a stupid movie. If you don't completely leave your brain at the door with this film, if you really try to analyze it from any rational viewpoint, it's completely retarded. Almost none of Gamer makes any logical sense (even in terms of being in "THE FUTURE"); start attempting to rationalize it with the real world and everything immediately falls apart. However, if you can manage to somehow shut off most of your more important synapses, Gamer can actually be a pretty fun experience. It felt like the kind of mindless movie that I would catch my father randomly watching on HBO and when asked what it was, he would respond "Oh, I don't know. some awful, stupid show about video games or something or other", yet he would sit and watch the whole thing, start to finish, despite himself.

Editor's Note: This is not my father, just a picture of a fatass gamer from the film that relates to my following statements. There, ass covered, let's move on.

     

       Probably the most impressive aspect of Gamer are its visuals. In a medium so saturated with flashy CG and crazy VFX and 3D and all sorts of other fun acronyms, at least this movie does it all in a somewhat unique style. Director of photography Ekkehart Pollack does some really beautiful things in this film, hell, even tons-o'-fun up there is filmed in a beautiful (albeit disgusting) manner. Particularly of note are the exterior prison yard shots; the bizarre, white desert setting doesn't really make any sense, but the high contrast, detailed cinematography is rather pretty.
      A less impressive aspect of Gamer is its atrocious story. I won't go into great detail, but essentially, Gerard Butler is wrongfully imprisoned due to a mysterious murder, Micheal C. Hall is an overnight gajillionaire (apparently "richer than Bill Gates" as described in the movie) due to creating a "video game" where the gamer actually controls real human beings in a relatively benign "The Sims"-like simulation called "Society". This eventually leads Hall to create a new "video game" entitled "Slayers"; essentially the real-life equivalent of a first person shooter like "Modern Warfare", in which Butler, a death row inmate, has a chance (extended in this "FUTURE" to all death row inmates) to be released if he can survive 30 rounds. "Slayers" is televised worldwide and apparently is the most popular thing everywhere since breathable air. Soooo, yeah, pretty much The Running Man with a video game twist. Oh, and this happens:

I actually wouldn't have minded if the entire film was just this scene extended for another hour. 

      That's really one of the most unfortunate things about the film. Micheal C. Hall has easily the most entertaining character (and it's pretty apparent that he relished getting to step a little bit outside of his Dexter box for a moment), but the fact that he is the main villain notwithstanding, he's barely in the movie at all. He makes a brief appearance in the first and third acts and that's about it. Everyone else in Gamer give passable performances, but for the most part you are simply yearning to see some more of Hall's antics.

      All said, Gamer is actually not all that bad. For a movie based on a game, that also borrows heavily from a far superior movie, it's more fun to watch than it really has any right to be. So, if you're in the mood for a mindless, but somewhat unique, dystopian-video game based-future action orgasm, then I suppose you would be at the right place. If not, then, I dunno, go rent the Cider House Rules or something, you self-righteous prick.

Shit, Utter Shit, or Holy Shit, It's Actually Halfway Decent: Holy Shit, It's Actually Halfway Decent!